Embracing Femininity in Fashion

Graphic by Carly Witteman.

Within fashion, people often find themselves stuck between the binary that is available to them: masculinity and femininity. My style growing up was defined by periods of dressing more masculine and then dressing more feminine. When I dressed closer to masculinity, I wanted to separate myself from all things “girly.” I did not want to be seen as “basic,” and I wanted to dress in a deviant way to gender norms. In a time period full of uncertainty with Covid-19, I felt like I could reclaim my power by leaning towards masculinity. I wore darker colors, I hated skirts and I avoided the color pink at all costs.

When I saw the Balletcore aesthetic on Tik Tok, I began to question this period in my life. The Balletcore aesthetic embraces all the things that I used to hate: the color pink, bows and tulle. It is closely associated with softness and femininity. Additionally, I saw the Coquette aesthetic and appreciated it. The Coquette aesthetic is one that romanticizes vintage fashion and is filled with lace, heart shaped jewelry and floral patterns. I noticed that many of these girls share a love for academia, as well. I was specifically inspired by @goldensoleil, a Tiktoker who attends Harvard, who wears pink bows and loves her lip gloss. She is a woman who is both feminine and academically driven.

With the rise of these aesthetics, I asked myself the question: can a woman dressing feminine be empowering? I think it can. In a society that constantly puts down femininity, I think it is powerful to embrace it as a woman. Femininity doesn’t necessarily have to have a negative connotation. We are expected to behave like men because they are the standard for most things in society. Masculine traits, like being assertive and being driven, are, by logic,  praised. Through dressing in a feminine way, women that are part of these aesthetics reclaim their femininity, and they are proud of it. Women do not have to hide their femininity and can embrace all sides of their identities.

I now proudly don my UGG boots with bows, my pink backpack and I enjoy frills. I can now comfortably embrace the feminine parts of my identity. I love being feminine because it means being attuned to my emotions, seeking and giving love and being receptive. I can call on my femininity when I need it. I can also break the stereotype that dressing in a feminine way does not go hand-in-hand with being academically driven. Femininity is not necessarily a set back; it is a source of power that we can call on within ourselves.